HELLO I AM BACK
He was waiting for me on he balcony when I came back! I have sooooo much to say that I dont know where to start, just one thing , if you have a gun at home I will scan some info for you that i GOT FROM THE POLICE DEPARTMENT. Love of my son won over all and I weighted everything and being in the same state with him is enough for me for now, ofcourse as long as love and respec is there . Wish all a good year ahead and after I get my stuff together I will share what I saw,heard,experienced and ....
Now some amazing stuff Bita sent: STEVEN WRIGHT*If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he's the famous erudite scientist who once said: "I woke up one morning and all of my stuff had been stolen ... and replaced by exact duplicates*." His mind sees things differently than we do, to our amazement and amusement. Here are some of his gems:
1. I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize. 2. Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back. 3. Half the people you know are below average. 4. 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name. 5. 42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot. 6. A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good. 7. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. 8. If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain. 9. All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.10. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.11. I almost had a psychic girlfriend, but she left me before we met.12. OK, so what's the speed of dark?13. How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?14. If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.15. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.16. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.17. Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.18. Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.19. I intend to live forever. So far, so good.20. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?21. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.22. What happens if you get scared half to death twice?23. My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."24. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?25. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.26. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.27. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.28. The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.29. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.30. The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.31. The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.32. The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.33. Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film
1 Comments:
Hi Roya. I often read your comments on discarded lies, but I thought I would come and visit you at your blogstead. I love Stephen Wright. He is brilliant. Here are a few more gems for your collection: "I once had a house along the freeway. I had to pull out of my driveway at 55 mph". What do you get when you cross an atheist with a dislexic? You get a guy who doesn't believe in Dog.
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